Who in the world knew that there were so many MORE things to be stressed out about than you first expected when having children. First of all, no one tells you that it really hurts when they take the placenta out of you after your baby comes out of you and no one tells you that the amount of debilitating tiredness after you have your baby makes you not remember anything and be ugly and it kind of never goes away. THEN they don't tell you that you should have appreciated your breasts in all their imperfections before because AFTER the children you are a grim shadow of your former breastness.
Then your children get larger and you're trying to make sure they have the right amounts of vitamins and wardrobe changes and meals and pacifiers that match their wardrobe changes and scriptures read to them every day and proper amounts of spanish pop music and english good music and classical music and wholesome videos and phonics and staying in the lines coloring and classic children's books read to them daily and newer children's books read to them daily and all of those books bought and read in english and spanish and timely potty training and intellectually stimulating toys and frivolous toys that mean nothing and toys that you always wanted as a child that are really for you and not your children and time spent playing on outdoor play structures and frolicking with correct amounts of SPF and positive reinforcement of good behavior and reproving betimes with sharpness and the whole increase of love afterward and preparing them to be kind to others but not so kind that they're wusses and not too mean to have to sit alone at lunch and not say "that man has a really big belly" right in front of 'that man' and kisses and hugs and endearing them to you above all others through whatever shameless methods available......
then you realize they have to go to school and have hobbies?
who is supposed to tell you what school to go to and when you even register a kid for school? Nobody tells people how to do these things. And what are my kids supposed to be good at for THE REST OF THEIR LIVES? and if I don't start them in these things last year preferably they're going to be dreadfully behind.
seriously.
who has time to make sure your children are talented, educated, safe, spiritual, beautiful, clever, quirky, funny, charming, scholarly and popular with other preschoolers? and take a shower?
impossible.
I mostly just sit with the yellow pages and think to myself....."Erin...what would you want to do if you were 3 and insane and unable to pay attention and only liked to whine and, while whining, bounced up and down in an incredibly annoying way? what about if you were 4 and thought you were the most talented person alive and already knew everything about everything and were
only being obedient when compelled by mortal fear of repercussions?"
I'm making light of a thing that haunts me daily. I'm not from Utah you know? I don't know where to take a kid for the best ballet classes or where to go for piano or violin lessons or theater workshops or singing lessons or soccer or whatever the hell else it is that every other person seems to have their children in and I don't.
Does the dad ever worry about these things enough to find out/register/lose sleep?
not in my experience.
8 comments:
so just pick one thing and try that. and then if they like that, keep doing it. if they don't, take a break. then try something else. cause, not only was that a big sentence but it was also a big worry and mine and other people's as well, so...put them in tumbling, or dance....and see how it goes:) it'll be great. and then when the dance teacher does something silly and not technically right, you'll be there to help out that situation, yeah?:)
I love it... I feel this way pretty much all the time. At least I can help with where to take them for dance classes and that is pretty much it. I don't have any other help... meaning I am just as lost as you are!
not in my experience either. And, once again, you take the words right out of my mouth and arrange them in a much more clever way.
Let me just say this: I totally get it. I can definitely empathize. And I love how the front office person at the school looks at you like you're a complete moron when you're not exactly sure what you need to do to register for kindergarten. Oh, and how your husband looks at you like you have completely lost it when you fail to cope with all the madness that is motherhood. Truly Erin. I get it. And don't worry. Taken from a quote by Jenkins Lloyd Jones (I have no idea who that is, by the way) "...most children grow u to be just people." And really? That's okay.
Sorry. Grow UP to be just people...
You are one funny little lady! I really enjoy reading your blog :)
what else can be said? with every word i read i was saying a big loud southern baptist "AMEN"! after all, we are just little girls in these adult bodies! who would have ever thought!
Loved the stream of consciousness thoughts about everything we're supposed to be doing for our kids. I just checked out a book from the library called "Einstein Never Used Flashcards" or something like that and it has completely absolved my desires to put our kids in all those classes you're talking about. Kids just need to play. That's it. One extracurricular activity, maybe, but mostly play is what develops their minds. That, and Matthew doesn't want them to be a band nerd like me, so for now, I'm letting go...
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